i've been MIA'd from blogging for sometime.. pretty much longer den usual i would say.. it's not that i dun have anything to say.. it just i feel so tired.. so so tired.. just din have e energy to load the webpage and talk about my day or past few days..
it's the period of the semester when all datelines and exams are converging together.. and that creates trememdous amount of stress.. however i've been able to hang on.. for now.. but this has taken a toll on me.. my body is no longer used to long hrs of studying.. plus vball training.. plus housework.. yah.. it just seems there's not enough time.. not enough energy..
it has come to the point that my mind is kind of saturated.. it's taking me more and more effort to understand anything.. i just cant seem to think properly anymore.. cant seem to think straight.. my whole strain of thought seems to be screwed up... so is right, wrong? or wrong, rite? wat's rite?? wat's wrong??
Monday, October 30, 2006
Sunday, October 22, 2006
How Impt is Work? More work = less time.
Just how important is your work? Does your life depend on it? Will you die without it? Or will u just not feel right without doing it? People view and value their work differently. The level of responsibility and commitment differs on an extensive range.
Personally i feel work should belong only in the workplace and only during the specified workhours which was agreed upon when the job is promised. I understand that this is sometimes not possible, therefore i can accept overtimes perhaps at a rate of 10-15%. I feel beyond that is plainly overcommitment which will mean overnegligence in many other aspects in life. Life is not just about work, work is essential as it give us the experience and money to self-sustain. If the job is also a personal interest, it just make the job slightly easier.
But when the job becomes over-consuming, we have to think through our processes and priorities. We have to ask why are things progressing so slowly, what's wrong with the process and immediately make changes to it so that things can get back on track asap. Plainly trying to put more hours into the work and not solving the root which is causing the problem will not help get the job done faster. It will only cause more problems to surface as you carry on. It like a leak in a dam, if all you try to do is to patch up the leak and not think about releasing the pressure from behind, all you get will be more leaks spring up as you try to patch up more cracks. It a vicious cycle, and it just keeps on spiraling until you feel that it's normal.
No, it's not normal at all. It's a very big problem waiting to explode. Sometimes while you are involved, immersed in the situation, you don't see the big picture. You just get so engross about solving your little part of the problem and hope everything else will just go well and fall into place. This is when you need someone to tell you that, there's a problem. And the problem is not on the surface, but right at the roots. And this is when, you face a very very tough decision. Often we will not have the resources to solve the problem at both ends, i.e. patch the cracks and relieve the dam pressure at the same time. And just as often, the root requires much more effort and time to solve as compared to surface problem. That's why most people choose to constantly patch up the crack.
Like I just said, it's a tough decision facing a snowballing issue. But when sometimes you just have to make the TOUGH choice. Relieve the dam pressure, although it's gonna take a while and most likely a few areas are going to get flooded due to the cracks not being repaired. But it is the tough choice, you lose some areas at first, but you save even more from the fate of a dam burst. And that's the big picture. So what's the rationale in working overtime almost everyday, when the only problem you are trying to solve, doesnt really solve the problem?
When leaks appear, it's never without reason. Please look at the root of the problem at the larger scale and stop wasting time patcing up holes here and there. Utimately you could have spent 40hrs patching up 40 holes while you could have just spend 36hrs diverting some of the dam water to another river.
Sometimes it's just your attitude, come on and toughen up against the problem. It's like making another tough decision, even though you personally have chosen to solve the problem at the root. You'll just have learn when to stop patching up cracks only, and start addressing the real problem. There will always be people who may not see your point, and people who will be at the receiving ends of the unpatched leaks. You have to brave through those people and make the correct decision, some people just have to wake up their ideas and they won't know pain until it really hurts. Some people will just have to be sacrificed for the greater good...
Personally i feel work should belong only in the workplace and only during the specified workhours which was agreed upon when the job is promised. I understand that this is sometimes not possible, therefore i can accept overtimes perhaps at a rate of 10-15%. I feel beyond that is plainly overcommitment which will mean overnegligence in many other aspects in life. Life is not just about work, work is essential as it give us the experience and money to self-sustain. If the job is also a personal interest, it just make the job slightly easier.
But when the job becomes over-consuming, we have to think through our processes and priorities. We have to ask why are things progressing so slowly, what's wrong with the process and immediately make changes to it so that things can get back on track asap. Plainly trying to put more hours into the work and not solving the root which is causing the problem will not help get the job done faster. It will only cause more problems to surface as you carry on. It like a leak in a dam, if all you try to do is to patch up the leak and not think about releasing the pressure from behind, all you get will be more leaks spring up as you try to patch up more cracks. It a vicious cycle, and it just keeps on spiraling until you feel that it's normal.
No, it's not normal at all. It's a very big problem waiting to explode. Sometimes while you are involved, immersed in the situation, you don't see the big picture. You just get so engross about solving your little part of the problem and hope everything else will just go well and fall into place. This is when you need someone to tell you that, there's a problem. And the problem is not on the surface, but right at the roots. And this is when, you face a very very tough decision. Often we will not have the resources to solve the problem at both ends, i.e. patch the cracks and relieve the dam pressure at the same time. And just as often, the root requires much more effort and time to solve as compared to surface problem. That's why most people choose to constantly patch up the crack.
Like I just said, it's a tough decision facing a snowballing issue. But when sometimes you just have to make the TOUGH choice. Relieve the dam pressure, although it's gonna take a while and most likely a few areas are going to get flooded due to the cracks not being repaired. But it is the tough choice, you lose some areas at first, but you save even more from the fate of a dam burst. And that's the big picture. So what's the rationale in working overtime almost everyday, when the only problem you are trying to solve, doesnt really solve the problem?
When leaks appear, it's never without reason. Please look at the root of the problem at the larger scale and stop wasting time patcing up holes here and there. Utimately you could have spent 40hrs patching up 40 holes while you could have just spend 36hrs diverting some of the dam water to another river.
Sometimes it's just your attitude, come on and toughen up against the problem. It's like making another tough decision, even though you personally have chosen to solve the problem at the root. You'll just have learn when to stop patching up cracks only, and start addressing the real problem. There will always be people who may not see your point, and people who will be at the receiving ends of the unpatched leaks. You have to brave through those people and make the correct decision, some people just have to wake up their ideas and they won't know pain until it really hurts. Some people will just have to be sacrificed for the greater good...
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Monitored LIfe
I suddenly have some IDEAS in my head and I din want it to be together with the last post cos it's totally irrelevant, i think.
It's about monitors.. Firstly, what are monitors? they are just like windows, but they are windows that show us images BEYOND reality. The first monitor that enter the life of the human race is the Redifusion, or simply the black & white TVs.. yupzZ.. that's the generation one of the little black box..
the little black box has totally chaged the world.. the TV has becomed from a pure form of entertainment & pasttime to an addiction, turning everyone of us into lifeless zombies(in nicer words coach potato, technically they are very much the same). the little black box has enable people to receive knowledge about the entire world by just a flick of a button.. Maybe if u weren't that obsessed with that black box, you would really lead a much more meaningful,eventful,fruitful life..
dun believe me?? dun think people are obsessed?? just look back.. since when is a drama series a must do thing in our life? remember how depressed you would become if u missed the last episode?? how about being so engrossed watching vcd/dvd until eat and sleep becomes unimportant?? or being totally oblivious to ur family calling at you while u watch ur fav comedy?? "knowledge cravings", when one shows ends, u switch channels and look for something else to dwell ur mind into... that's obsessed..
however TV is evil no.2 nowadays.. now's the IT age.. and the number 1 EVIL goes to... *drumroll*... the computer monitor. Everyday, almost everyone would face a computer monitor.. it's no longer just wat the tv decides to show you, the computer and the internet give u the power and control to chosoe watever, whenever you wanna see... it has becomed a way of life.. it's not just entertainment like TV.. it's much more den that.. it's work,communication and many more..
see how the monitors are appearing everywhere and taking over our lifes.. and how i can i leave out the latest doll of the IT industry since the late 90s?? the HandPhone.. dun forget the screen u have on ur HP.. it's a monitor too!! now everyone has a portable monitor.. when was the last time u ever get onto a public transport which has NOONE using a HP?? not in the last 20 yrs i tell you...
have u ever wondered.. as we look into the monitor and see an image.. there might be someone staring right back at us and we dun even know it.. better still.. that someone is telling us to do things right now.. which we dun even realise.. aint that scary?? not possible?? well i seriously believe it is possible.. just that no one is crazy enough to try it out yet.. just imagine planting messages into the computer images which isonly recognisable by the brain and not the eye... or radio frequencies in the sub-audible ranges... i could be telling to transfer all ur $$ into my account this very moment..
anyway.. dun worry just yet.. i'm just in the mood to tell stories.. k back to my main point.. Our lifes are so filled with monitors and maybe cameras.. everything we do is being scrutinised and watched.. pretty much like the events in the move "enemy of the state".. no wonder more and more ppl are running back into the woods..
one day monitors will become non-physcial.. like the holographic stuff we see in sci-fi movies.. yupzZ.. that's the future for monitors and e future for us.. We are not living in the age of computer or IT.. We are living in the age of MONITORS...
It's about monitors.. Firstly, what are monitors? they are just like windows, but they are windows that show us images BEYOND reality. The first monitor that enter the life of the human race is the Redifusion, or simply the black & white TVs.. yupzZ.. that's the generation one of the little black box..
the little black box has totally chaged the world.. the TV has becomed from a pure form of entertainment & pasttime to an addiction, turning everyone of us into lifeless zombies(in nicer words coach potato, technically they are very much the same). the little black box has enable people to receive knowledge about the entire world by just a flick of a button.. Maybe if u weren't that obsessed with that black box, you would really lead a much more meaningful,eventful,fruitful life..
dun believe me?? dun think people are obsessed?? just look back.. since when is a drama series a must do thing in our life? remember how depressed you would become if u missed the last episode?? how about being so engrossed watching vcd/dvd until eat and sleep becomes unimportant?? or being totally oblivious to ur family calling at you while u watch ur fav comedy?? "knowledge cravings", when one shows ends, u switch channels and look for something else to dwell ur mind into... that's obsessed..
however TV is evil no.2 nowadays.. now's the IT age.. and the number 1 EVIL goes to... *drumroll*... the computer monitor. Everyday, almost everyone would face a computer monitor.. it's no longer just wat the tv decides to show you, the computer and the internet give u the power and control to chosoe watever, whenever you wanna see... it has becomed a way of life.. it's not just entertainment like TV.. it's much more den that.. it's work,communication and many more..
see how the monitors are appearing everywhere and taking over our lifes.. and how i can i leave out the latest doll of the IT industry since the late 90s?? the HandPhone.. dun forget the screen u have on ur HP.. it's a monitor too!! now everyone has a portable monitor.. when was the last time u ever get onto a public transport which has NOONE using a HP?? not in the last 20 yrs i tell you...
have u ever wondered.. as we look into the monitor and see an image.. there might be someone staring right back at us and we dun even know it.. better still.. that someone is telling us to do things right now.. which we dun even realise.. aint that scary?? not possible?? well i seriously believe it is possible.. just that no one is crazy enough to try it out yet.. just imagine planting messages into the computer images which isonly recognisable by the brain and not the eye... or radio frequencies in the sub-audible ranges... i could be telling to transfer all ur $$ into my account this very moment..
anyway.. dun worry just yet.. i'm just in the mood to tell stories.. k back to my main point.. Our lifes are so filled with monitors and maybe cameras.. everything we do is being scrutinised and watched.. pretty much like the events in the move "enemy of the state".. no wonder more and more ppl are running back into the woods..
one day monitors will become non-physcial.. like the holographic stuff we see in sci-fi movies.. yupzZ.. that's the future for monitors and e future for us.. We are not living in the age of computer or IT.. We are living in the age of MONITORS...
A Week On
it's been a week since my last post and YET i have nothing much to say.. i haven done anything much in school this week.. felt really like shit for e past few days... maybe it's my PMS (Personal Mental Syndrome) kicking in.. it's just the time of the month when i start feeling low esteemed and super discourage about everything and a severe lack of motivation to do anything..
but i hope it's getting better, cos i'm finally starting to do some work.. been in front of the comp doing work for the past 5 hrs or so.. so yah.. perhaps the engine is re-starting again.. but i have stuff to catch up this time... i'm no longer ahead of time like i was in the past few weeks.. just a few days of slacking and now i'm behind time.. that's how fast-Paced uni is..
well.. today in gonna be a long long day in school.. 9am to 4pm.. after which there's IFG vball.. shld i go down for IFG or shld i just hide somewhere and study/do tutorials?? perhaps i'll do both..
seriously, life is definitely not just about studying.. NOR is it only about playing Games...
but i hope it's getting better, cos i'm finally starting to do some work.. been in front of the comp doing work for the past 5 hrs or so.. so yah.. perhaps the engine is re-starting again.. but i have stuff to catch up this time... i'm no longer ahead of time like i was in the past few weeks.. just a few days of slacking and now i'm behind time.. that's how fast-Paced uni is..
well.. today in gonna be a long long day in school.. 9am to 4pm.. after which there's IFG vball.. shld i go down for IFG or shld i just hide somewhere and study/do tutorials?? perhaps i'll do both..
seriously, life is definitely not just about studying.. NOR is it only about playing Games...
Thursday, October 12, 2006
Tough Week
it's been a tough start to the week.. physically.. IVP training on monday, and that almost killed me totally... the training was slightly for physical den normal.. and i was totally drained.. even now my back and chest are stil aching.. really unfit..
fell really sick yesterday.. think it was my lunch.. contaminated food which i made i guess.. i heated up the food which was in the fridge for like, 1 week.. yah.. my stomach just couldnt hack it.. and i felt like shit the whole nite.. vomited late at nite.. guess wat came out.. it was my lunch.. it was still intact.. so wat's e cause of my weak stomach?? and this morning too i felt like shit.. but i still dragged myself to school.. cos i really felt i would be lost if i din attend the tutorials.. esp when my group mates aint the type who pay attention.. anyway i'm feeling better now.. and it time to head back to the books...
oh yah.. i would be going back to tj to help in coaching.. that's so exciting..
fell really sick yesterday.. think it was my lunch.. contaminated food which i made i guess.. i heated up the food which was in the fridge for like, 1 week.. yah.. my stomach just couldnt hack it.. and i felt like shit the whole nite.. vomited late at nite.. guess wat came out.. it was my lunch.. it was still intact.. so wat's e cause of my weak stomach?? and this morning too i felt like shit.. but i still dragged myself to school.. cos i really felt i would be lost if i din attend the tutorials.. esp when my group mates aint the type who pay attention.. anyway i'm feeling better now.. and it time to head back to the books...
oh yah.. i would be going back to tj to help in coaching.. that's so exciting..
Sunday, October 08, 2006
Sunday Blues
it's sunday, and it's giving me pre-monday blues.. why?? cos tml got test, which i haven study for.. mum's not around cos she went cruise.. din go for basketball this morning cos there was poor attendance.. due to even poorer PSI index...
It's a blue blue day.. heh...
It's a blue blue day.. heh...
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Tiring Week
It's been a long long week.. tiring week.. din have much sleep at all.. cos slow work rate and study rate.. so stayed up most of the nites.. played game online too.. been playing this online game Reincarnation for a long time.. u just get hooked onto it.. why?? cos there's so much to learnt in this game.. how to defend, attack, build and many other aspect of e game.. if this were a course in NUS.. it would take plenty of modules.. hahaa.. anyway i'm going to put a link to the game here.. 
for MY easy access.. ppl interested can go take a look too.. but let me know if u are going to play k.. i dun mind more allies... hehe..
just now went to huiting's "surprise" birthday party.. which wasnt really a surprise.. thanks to her boyfriend's not too good planning.. hahaa.. but ok lar... got frens down.. talk talk, eat eat, play play lor.. usual stuff.. and of cos alcohol.. boring rite?? but yah.. that's the way things goes in this part of the globe.. duhzZ...
looking forward to a weekend of good rest.. still got test on monday..
for MY easy access.. ppl interested can go take a look too.. but let me know if u are going to play k.. i dun mind more allies... hehe..just now went to huiting's "surprise" birthday party.. which wasnt really a surprise.. thanks to her boyfriend's not too good planning.. hahaa.. but ok lar... got frens down.. talk talk, eat eat, play play lor.. usual stuff.. and of cos alcohol.. boring rite?? but yah.. that's the way things goes in this part of the globe.. duhzZ...
looking forward to a weekend of good rest.. still got test on monday..
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
How small things can affect u greatly, a.k.a. the Butterly Effect
How big a thing is printing alot of notes.. say like 200 pages of it.. on 2 sides.. that makes it like 100 pieces of paper.. for me , it took me almost 3 hrs just to complete that task.. i bought a laser printer to make my notes printing faster.. but it can only print 1 sided.. 2 sided printings have to be flipped manually for printing.. i could have just reduced the page size and just print 2 pages on one side.. but for the sake of readability.. i did the flipping.. and stupid me.. lost so many hrs of sleep cos of that.. esp after a long day in school and vball training..
so 3.30am was the time i finally can pack up.. omg.. by the time i woke up.. it's 10am!! and i was suppose to go to 8am.. 2 hrs late, lucky for me lessons only start at 10am.. well yah.. at least i din miss too much.. just one lecture... managed to reach school in time for my 2nd lesson.. but that cost me $12 in taxi fare.. and i was really struggling to stay awake.. tough man...
lessons ended quite early today.. by 1pm it's end of day.. went to buy a textbook which costs $35 bucks... luckily a fren is going to buy it frm me.. and i'll just photocopy the whole book.. heh.. save a bit of $$, btw my daily budget is only $10.. just one taxi ride has already landed me in deficit.. suckzZ man.. so in order to photocopy the book.. i gave up plans to stay in school to study.. when to katong shopping centre instead.. took 10 from outside HMK..
along the way there was this irriting uncle, whose phone was ringing away and he just refuses to pick up the call.. at first i was thinking if he was just interesting in listening to is monotonic ringtone.. den i realise he's avoiding the calls.. after the stupid song was played like 4 times.. i was on the verge of going up to him and tell him to turn of the ring tone and switch it to silent.. BUT, this indian guy sitting behind me got to him first.. and he was frenly at all.. yell at the man to turn of his phone, saying he was disturbing his sleep, blah blah blah.. heated argument.. but the uncle's phone just went on ringing.. but he got off the next stop.. they even exchange middle fingers as the bus went pass him.. damn comical.. i think i would handled things in a totally different way.. i think...
hahaa..
anyway, he was really disturbing our sleep.. i fell asleep soon after.. and zZzZzzZz.. i overslept.. only woke up at siglap.. so i had to alight and take a bus back to Katong.. still gotta climb overhead bridge.. sianzZ.. but the lucky ting is that i found a shop that manage to get the photocopying done by tml morning.. so i can collect tml.. that's good..
Ever imagine how different this day could be if the notes din take me so long?? A hell load different i tell u.. that's why when i see time travel movies.. sometimes u know it's just now realistic.. cos if ever someone manages to get back in time.. everything little thing he does will just create not just a small change but a whole new different alternate universe... SCARY!!
so 3.30am was the time i finally can pack up.. omg.. by the time i woke up.. it's 10am!! and i was suppose to go to 8am.. 2 hrs late, lucky for me lessons only start at 10am.. well yah.. at least i din miss too much.. just one lecture... managed to reach school in time for my 2nd lesson.. but that cost me $12 in taxi fare.. and i was really struggling to stay awake.. tough man...
lessons ended quite early today.. by 1pm it's end of day.. went to buy a textbook which costs $35 bucks... luckily a fren is going to buy it frm me.. and i'll just photocopy the whole book.. heh.. save a bit of $$, btw my daily budget is only $10.. just one taxi ride has already landed me in deficit.. suckzZ man.. so in order to photocopy the book.. i gave up plans to stay in school to study.. when to katong shopping centre instead.. took 10 from outside HMK..
along the way there was this irriting uncle, whose phone was ringing away and he just refuses to pick up the call.. at first i was thinking if he was just interesting in listening to is monotonic ringtone.. den i realise he's avoiding the calls.. after the stupid song was played like 4 times.. i was on the verge of going up to him and tell him to turn of the ring tone and switch it to silent.. BUT, this indian guy sitting behind me got to him first.. and he was frenly at all.. yell at the man to turn of his phone, saying he was disturbing his sleep, blah blah blah.. heated argument.. but the uncle's phone just went on ringing.. but he got off the next stop.. they even exchange middle fingers as the bus went pass him.. damn comical.. i think i would handled things in a totally different way.. i think...
hahaa..
anyway, he was really disturbing our sleep.. i fell asleep soon after.. and zZzZzzZz.. i overslept.. only woke up at siglap.. so i had to alight and take a bus back to Katong.. still gotta climb overhead bridge.. sianzZ.. but the lucky ting is that i found a shop that manage to get the photocopying done by tml morning.. so i can collect tml.. that's good..
Ever imagine how different this day could be if the notes din take me so long?? A hell load different i tell u.. that's why when i see time travel movies.. sometimes u know it's just now realistic.. cos if ever someone manages to get back in time.. everything little thing he does will just create not just a small change but a whole new different alternate universe... SCARY!!
Sunday, October 01, 2006
Starlight Cinema
It 's almost the end of the week long break.. it seem as if it hasnt begun.. why?? cos it felt as if i have not done anything during this week.. neither entertainment nor work.. it felt as if the week has just disappear.. however.. tonight's my last nite of fun.. well thursday shld have been my last day of fun.. somehow it dragged... after tonite.. actually after bball tml morning.. i'll mug.. mug like hell cos i got loads of stuff to do.. SHIT..
anyway back to the point.. it's the highlight of the week.. had a surprise for yanli tonite.. wat is it?? this..
she totally doesnt know anything about it.. well. neither do i.. except i hear on the radio quite often.. and this poster i pass by everyday at aljunied mrt.. so i planned this surprise for her..
starlight cinema = outdoor movie screening.. so i chose tonight... 2 movies.. MI2 & MI3.. and also prepared a lot of food for a picnic.. and i have a new dessert.. it's creme caramel.. pretty good.. looks quite posh.. but real easy to make, although a bit time consuming.. really quite shiok except the sitting on the ground kindda gave me a backache... some vip actually got air beds in the middle of the field.. that's shiok.. i'm gonna find out how to become VIP.. and next yr i'll be shiok too.. hahaha.. anyway.. we had a lot of food and fun.. cos this event is sponsored by Nokia, so they had ppl going around with the new N93 & N73 taking photos and videos for us.. den we'll get to see ourselves on the big screen and also free photo developing done.. heh..
then there was this couple from NUS in front of us.. OMG.. cam whoring.. hahaa.. see their face so so many times.. they must have gone to every sales person.. crazy.. anyway... we took quite a bit of photos ourselves... it's up at my foto site.. go see...
anyway back to the point.. it's the highlight of the week.. had a surprise for yanli tonite.. wat is it?? this..
she totally doesnt know anything about it.. well. neither do i.. except i hear on the radio quite often.. and this poster i pass by everyday at aljunied mrt.. so i planned this surprise for her..
starlight cinema = outdoor movie screening.. so i chose tonight... 2 movies.. MI2 & MI3.. and also prepared a lot of food for a picnic.. and i have a new dessert.. it's creme caramel.. pretty good.. looks quite posh.. but real easy to make, although a bit time consuming.. really quite shiok except the sitting on the ground kindda gave me a backache... some vip actually got air beds in the middle of the field.. that's shiok.. i'm gonna find out how to become VIP.. and next yr i'll be shiok too.. hahaha.. anyway.. we had a lot of food and fun.. cos this event is sponsored by Nokia, so they had ppl going around with the new N93 & N73 taking photos and videos for us.. den we'll get to see ourselves on the big screen and also free photo developing done.. heh..
then there was this couple from NUS in front of us.. OMG.. cam whoring.. hahaa.. see their face so so many times.. they must have gone to every sales person.. crazy.. anyway... we took quite a bit of photos ourselves... it's up at my foto site.. go see...
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